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Pages: ok very serious question... [1]
Author Topic: Ok very serious question...
flood

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2011-02-08 17-41-33

ok very serious question... I never hid my nature from my daughters, they only saw the soft outside D/s little rituals that went on. My taking off his shoes, my bringing him dinner and never letting a glass he was drinking from empty. Soft. Ok so my oldest now 19, when she was 17 expressed great interest, she had met her first bf who oddly enough had great D potential according to what she had talked to me about. (Yes we talked quite openly then) When she turned 18 I bought her, her first full set of restraints, cuffing sets (beautiful white leather with purple fur lining), a paddle, a newbie whip and some toys. We did cover her safety in excess. She has a from of epilepsy that stops her heart. Although medication controls it very very well, only having issue now when she gets a fever. she broke up with the bf after about 8 months and has not dated since, she wants to and wants to find someone her age or close that has D potential and great understanding and kindness. She has been bugging me to allow her to put a profile up on collarme. Now to the parents....as parents putting yourself in my spot what is your advice? She lives with me, does not drive, is super duper close to me, is a good girl and does not drink or do drugs, is polite and sweet, but she is really interested in this and wanting my help. I'm honestly stumped because I've only been with the D person and we didn't find each other in a D/s setting we evolved into it. What do I do???
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nicoline

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2011-02-09 11-24-34

While I applaud the closeness you share with your daughter, I find this level of 'sharing' to be a bit disturbing. I believe in talking to your about sex and being available to answer questions. What exactly is your question? Are you asking us if you should help her put up an ad for a D? I would not share intimate details of my private life with my ren. They are my , at 9 or 19, and they don't need to know. And, I don't want to know the inner workings of their sex lives either. And, I wouldn't buy them sex toys either...but, that's just me.
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yonghwan

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2011-02-09 16-38-00

funny thing is I wonder if this was a guy talking about his 19 son if people would view it differently. I just wonder, I have no opinion on the topic way or the other.
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anora

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2011-02-09 18-13-18

I hear you it's an interesting subject, an awkward too I suppose. I have very young ones so this will not be an issue for me for a very long time.
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capo

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2011-02-10 11-15-47

But when they get older... Would you encourage them to engage in bdsm? Would you influence them by giving them too much info about your own sexual proclivites? I would not. If my grow up and become kinky then so be it. But I would never want to influence that in anyway.
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fawkes

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2011-02-10 20-40-04

to answer your question I would not lead them into BDSM, if they asked me about it I would answer their questions without letting them onto what their mother and I indulged in. But I cannot say or how other people should respond to their own . And maybe I read her wrong but I got the feeling the daughter asked her about it. did i read it wrong?
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  • atencio

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    2011-02-11 10-53-16

    No I think *I* read it wrong... It sounded to me like she was encouraging her young daughter to find a dom. Sorry bout that. :)
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    hext

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    2011-02-11 13-39-52

    noooooooooo I am not encouraging her to find any she has expressed she wants to find one, she wants to put up a collarme profile. I am not finding her anything.
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  • smittle

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    2011-02-12 2-17-39-

    i'm not a big beleiver in any on line hook ups...seems potentianally dangerous to me.
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  • ehrhart

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    2011-02-12 21-32-36

    your correct after she met her first bf she talked to me about things they were doing that were D/s related. I did not talk her into it.
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  • pooser

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    2011-02-13 16-17-30

    I think you are doing the good mom thing I would explain to her the risks of online forums and collarme kind of sites. at 19 she will be a magnet for weirdos and freaks and psychopaths. she might also meet a nice boy her age. who knows.
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    cordell

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    2011-02-13 20-52-39

    yes thats my feelings so do I just tell her No way not as long as your in my house No online dating?
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    dickman

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    2011-03-17 19-37-53

    read my posts below the most recent replies :-)
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  • wiersma

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    2011-04-30 22-17-13

    You have to decide what rules make sense for your house. We really can't help you with that.
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  • doug

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    2011-09-16 11-59-24

    She is an adult. Have a conversation with her about safety and your concerns. Keep the doors of communication open. She will make mistakes, be there to support her.
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    Leonore

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    2011-11-10 17-57-11

    she has not... had any details of my inner personal life. she only saw what would have been considered totally normal activity in say the x's or x's a woman taking care of her man more attentivly then we have seen in the last x yrs or so. You know before the whole women lib thing. Please don't slam me for this statement it's the best analogy I could find.
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    pullin

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    2012-04-30 16-58-56

    good analogy
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  • johnsey

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    2013-01-26 23-42-09

    No slam. I did misread your OP the first time. I understand better now. To answer your OP more clearly... I would say do not encourage her to put an ad on collarme.com. If she does it of her own accord then so be it. But remind her that your safe loving D/s dynamic evolved over time and out of love.
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  • conley

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    2014-03-07 8-48-34-

    ^^ good advice and keep in mind, the judgment of a x is going to be immature, she lacks experience. online activity requires judgment because it can be so fucking evil and even dangerous at times.
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    rubalcava

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    2015-06-19 12-02-12

    maybe encourage her maybe encourage her to read sites about "xs wives" and not BDSM. there are sites dedicated to that subject and they're not pornographic or teeming with weirdos.
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    Beryl

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    2015-10-20 13-23-54

    this is an excellent idea...this I will do thank you
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